


Half Life X Readers

by megertles



Category: Half Life, half life 2, half life alyx, hl - Fandom
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:27:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23746843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megertles/pseuds/megertles
Summary: My compilation of X Readers I write at my tumblr @mask-knife all in one place!female reader, gender neutral and male are all written
Kudos: 15





	1. Gordon Freeman X GN reader angst

A short drabble X gender neutral reader with Gordon Freeman.

Gordon in stasis contemplates about the person he misses most and the time he regrets not cherishing.

*******************************************************************************************

If he had the chance to tell them, what would he say? He asked himself that everyday. But still after so long he still didn't have an answer. To come up with one that truly encompassed how he felt and the reality of his situation felt impossible. So much so that it almost felt pointless. All he could think to say was what had made him happy before all of this. And despite how much it felt like it wasn't enough he would tell them again and again how thankful he was to have had them there with him.

The memory of a warm smell and soft sheets always hit him first. Lazy days with no work coming and there they would be resting and peering up at him from their phone with that happy look. They looked at him like he was the best person in the world and even if he didn't feel like it their gaze made him feel light and like all his problems didn't matter. How lucky he was to have such a person to coax him to bed when he worked so much he fell asleep at his home desk. Their warm hands lifting off his glasses and whispering to him that he couldn't be the smartest man in the world if he didn't get any sleep.

He really wasn't the smartest man in the world. But sometimes it was like they were more invested in his work than he was and whenever he was frustrated they were always there to ask him with genuine interest to explain his problem. Truth be told they really didn't understand any of it but they showed so much fascination and would look at him like he was some great science wizard. That look never went away and he wondered how they put up with him. But they did. And it was always more than what he felt he deserved.

Those were the things he would tell them, he thought to himself. He would kiss them so softly, just as he had when he had kissed them for the first time. Shakily and nervous on their first date huddled away from rain. He would tell them he loved them more than the world and tell them he was sorry. Sorry wasn't enough either. But the money and prestige of the job was too good. He almost had no choice but to leave them for it. Their saddened face as he promised to come back soon once his contract was done left an ache in his chest that by now was a large hole.

Empty, it left a hollow ache that he knew could never be filled. And all that could be done was to think of their hands on his and the scent of their hair mixed with the cologne he sometimes wore too much of. It hurt. It hurt too much to even want to think of but they were all that kept him solace. This place devoid of anything not even time kept him suspended in nothing. It was a feeling impossible to explain that did all but kill him. Death felt like a sweet notion after this. But worst of all he knew. He knew that whatever this place was it was keeping him from them. And somehow he had the horrible feeling that if this ever ended they would be gone.

Whatever was in play now would have effects he couldn't be sure of. Perhaps his connection to them or just a painful intuition told him that they were going on without him. And they wouldn't be there anymore when or if he ever came back. It was too much to hope for that he could come back. After years of suspension the ring in his pocket suddenly felt heavier. They were gone. Whether this was cruel fate toying with him or just a sudden awful realization it made the hole in himself deepen and rooted into his heart.

The ring with its simple stone that he managed to pay off no longer had a hand to fit onto. In the empty unending void without any comfort or pity he could only slip away trying to block away the emotions. He drifted off awaiting whatever fate would hand him if it decided to. Alone.


	2. Russell X Fem Reader Fluff

As requested! Here is a Russell X Reader fic! Just some fluff that I'm a bit worried will be out of character or too cheesy but oh well I really had fun writing this I love my boi Russ!

*******************************************************************************************

The lab was as dim and messy as always. But once their eyes adjusted it quickly became a world of beeps and blips on most surfaces anything else littered with what looked like trash. On closer inspection it seemed to be bits and ends of random things some machinery others books or clothes. Figures and notes prevented most surfaces from being empty.

"Come on now he should be in here somewhere."

Eli said turning his head around wildly to track down the man. Peering around a corner he called out,   
"Russ!"

A clank happened presumably Eli having startled the man followed by a cry of pain after another clunk. Shuffling the sound of something heavy getting set down loudly a man rubbing his head came into the hall where they could see Eli and (y/n).

"Eli! Good to see you how's the leg?" The man quickly had a hand to Eli's shoulder warmly while adjusting his askew hat.

"Still gone." Eli replied with a blank face.

"Shame!"

This immediately sent both of them into hysterics. She stood there a bit shocked by the joke but quickly relaxed since Eli found it hilarious. The man clearly didn't mean anything bad by it and exuded an extremely warm friendly energy. Noticing the young woman made the man stand up straighter having not known she was there.

"Oh- Hello there! You brought a friend didya?"

Eli turned to face her extending an arm in her direction gladly.

"Sure did. This is (y/n). She's the one I found that can help you."

The man looked confused glancing at Eli.

"Help? I don't need-"

A knowing look from Eli quickly stopped that sentence. He nodded quickly and spoke with what she could quickly pick up on an incredibly thick accent. She wondered where it was from as he peered around himself hands going to his hips.

"Right."

Eli was and crossed his arms looking pleased with himself. Attention back to her the man extended his hand.

"The name's Russell. Nice to meet ya."

She took it deciding very quickly that she liked this man. His warm excitable voice and somewhat everywhere nature was undeniably likable. Though his choice of clothes were extremely strange.

"Likewise."

She said smiling warmly unable to help but feel brighter around this man. He wore finger-less gloves that felt soft to touch and had a warm firm but comforting grip. Eli spoke up again glancing around the place.

"How do you work like this Russ?"

Referring to the mess. Russell laughed again but pointedly like making fun of Eli's remark as if it was obvious.

"There's a method to my madness! Anyways, that isn't important! I really could use your help actually."

He clasped his hands together before bringing them to his chin looking at her with interest. She perked up excited as Eli had told her he was a brilliant man who was working on extremely important tech.

**********

Sorting books and cleaning wasn't exactly what she had in mind. Eli had left abruptly as he had other matters and left her under Russell's command. She had expected tech wiring or information mining. But nope. Sorting what looked to be years worth if not decades of files, books and random things was her task. It would be funny if it wasn't disappointing. He had stood tall and proud as she stared at him in confusion.

"Organization of information is just as important as discovering it!"

He had declared with conviction.

"What even is this for?"

Which had him grab a book from the pile.

"Not sure. Too many to remember."

The expression she gave him made him quickly retreat back to one of his many monitors.

"Great! Thanks for the help mate!"

Before she could protest he was gone and she was forced to start on the pile. That had been an hour ago. Now she had several piles of things amassed separating books from pieces of machinery, many of which were covered in dust and old files. She could hear him tinkering away in another room busily occasionally talking to himself and shuffling around.

Eventually he wandered back while eating a stale food ration and looked over what she was doing.

Engrossed in a book that she sensed was extremely old it was a copy of Charlotte's Web. Noticing the cover he couldn't help but feel a bittersweet gladness at seeing a younger person clearly experiencing it for the first time. He spoke up making her start.

"I hate spiders. When she died it was sad tho I cried for 2 days. When I was a kid of course."

She snapped from her startled jolt exclaiming loudly in horror.

"SHE DIES!?"

His face froze awkwardly as he realized what he did a beat passing.

"Right."

Quickly moving and changing the subject he plucked the book from her hands.

"Well I think you did quite nicely! Now one pile is three!"

She reached for the book but quickly gave up as he flipped through it lazily.

"Where did you get all this from?"

Picking up another device it seemed to be a phone.

"It's all pre war."

He shut the book and looked over it going quiet for just a moment.

"Preserving what we had is important."

He said quickly remaining upbeat and grinned like it wasn't a very big deal. She could sense that he almost wanted to avoid it and dropped it. She could understand why these things would be important. Sitting here and just reading sounded like heaven if she had to be honest. Spotting something in another pile she had yet to sort she pulled it out. A small flat black container held a round shining disk.

"And this?"

His face lit up almost immediately and he pointed at it knowingly with a grin.

"That!"

He exclaimed before shuffling over to his monitor and started to boot something up. Seeing his excitement she followed interest incredibly peaked.

"Is a CD! We used to store music on it."

"Music?"

She blurted out in disbelief looking over it's strange reflective back layer the top white. Grabbing what looked like a box like device he plugged it into his monitor.

"Here. Pop it in."

She didn't know what he meant by that at all glancing down at the CD. Opening its container she carefully reached to take it out and marveled as it shined and seemed extremely fragile. Russel pressed a button and a tray opened up with a circle that matched the circle left in the middle of the CD. Figuring it out she placed it down with caution scared of breaking it and let it click into place.   
Russell pushed the tray down and pressed a button that once had a play button that had worn away long ago.

"Lets see what I put on here-"

She waited patiently hearing the device whirring like it was spinning which fascinated her greatly. It was a bit complex and she wondered how it was possible to put music onto plastic. Suddenly music started to play which stunned. She didn't remember the last time she heard it last and looked to Russ mouth hanging open.

"Wow!"

He looked pleased with himself watching her study the CD player with great interest.

"heh yeah. This is pretty old school even for me. This one's called uh...."

He looked up in thought trying to remember.

"Foot loose."

Grinning in memories he listened for a moment as she enjoyed how it sounded but caught a strange smell like burning metal.

"What's that?"

She muttered going to cover her nose.

"What's what-SHIT-"

With that he was up and off again to stop whatever that was having been distracted by nostalgia. Soon she was back to sorting but this time enjoyed the music that played from the CD player. None she knew, but was an assortment of songs spanning different decades, all extremely fun to listen to. One called Mr. Blue Sky had her swaying a lot, head bobbing as she grew close to completing the pile.

He knew being too noisy was an extremely bad idea but the feeling that hearing music again gave him was too good to pass by. Forced to take a break from melding on metal to an exterior hull of another droid at risk of overheating he wandered back into his monitor area and started to work on that, figuring out a few schematics. She was busily putting books onto a shelf that she had cleared of her own volition softly bumping along to the music.

He couldn't help but sway to the music and when he stood again to stretch he hummed along to the lyrics of "Don't Stop Believin" which made her look at him. She grinned as he seemed to be very happy lost in nostalgia feeling the song. Seeing him happy was a very contagious feeling and she quickly figured out the chorus humming along as well.

"Good ain't it?"

He called out from the monitor.

"This song topped charts for a long time! Everyone's favorite!"

His random blurbs were so interesting as she looked off trying to imagine it. What a world it must have been.Though she didn't know what charts he meant.

"Wow. That's cool."

He sounded very satisfied by her genuine response.

"Yeah. Yeah it is."

In the matter of another hour standing still wasn't really possible and she finally burst out laughing when she saw him do a very small jig in place while flipping through files. She realized during these hours that he hadn't really asked her much about herself but seemed to have no issue dancing a bit and being extremely comfortable in her presence. Well maybe he just didn't really care. He was definitely eccentric but his random mutterings and questions he asked himself aloud were very entertaining. It made the mundane much less boring to say the least. Such an interesting man he is, she noted to herself.

The track changed the beginning notes making him freeze in recognition. Looking up his face looked like he was having a sudden flashback, which he was, making her look over in confusion. The beat picked us as "Take On Me" started. She of course didn't know it but the beat was undeniably bouncy and she started to sway side to side. Russell stared at her feeling the wave of nostalgia coming up way too high and started to slowly shimmy side to side. When sudden happy plucky synth started she went into it immediately and laughed as he looked like he was holding himself back.

The mood finally caved as hours of bumping to great music got to them both and they started dancing in place. The lyrics started and he couldn't help but start singing along in a very lousy but fun voice.

"We're talking away  
I don't know what  
I'm to say I'll say it anyway  
Today's another day to find you  
Shying away  
I'll be coming for your love, okay?"

Losing herself in it she danced around in a silly way enjoying the lyrics. Russell now giving in to it pointed at her like he was getting ready for something. It was the catchy chorus.

"Take on me! (Take on me)

Take me on (take on me)

I'll be gone  
In a day or two!!!"

He attempted to hit the note which made her laugh very loudly at him. Pleased with his effort he held out his hand to her eagerly swaying. She took it without hesitation not remembering the last time she was this carefree in such a long time. Pulling her closer to him he twirled her before they joined together and started to just bounce back and forth badly couple dancing. Laughing happily she enjoyed his softened face while he kept going with the lyrics.

"So needless to say  
I'm odds and ends  
But I'll be stumbling away  
Slowly learning that life is okay  
Say after me  
It's no better to be safe than sorry!"

Dancing around in circles together they narrowly avoided the desk, She trippd over her own foot as they tried to avoid another box, quickly catching her by her arms they both stopped for a moment as the music went on.

"Woah! You alright?"

She looked up at him ready to just laugh it off and stopped once she looked directly up at him. The second they made eye contact almost immediately things froze. Realizing she had just met this man well over twice her age about 2 hours ago it became very apparent how strange it was to suddenly be dancing with him. At a secret lab nonetheless. The situation seemed to click with him to as peering into her face had him tense a bit. Neither in a bad way but in a bit of shock and slight embarrassment as they had both seemed to have ignored boundaries extremely quickly. For once he didn't say anything clearly not good at saying anything that was too direct.

Getting a good look at his face she could see his bright brilliant eyes that shined intellect and warm optimism. His aged faced held so much to it, the face of someone who had seen everything and knew almost everything. Or at least acted like he did. Such spunk and wit held in it she noted again like she was confirming her own earlier decision. She very much liked this man.

Laughing again his face relaxed seeing that she didn't seem bothered at all by the awkwardness thinking it was silly. Brushing it off in a friendly way she finally straightened up ready to step away and catch her breath. The final chorus was just starting and she had finally tired herself out. But before she could step away his hand took hers and twirled her away refusing to let her go before they finished the song.

Giggling in surprise she let him as they started a messy jive like dance smiling up at him as he was actually counting out loud to keep his steps on beat with his ever lively voice.

"An one, an two, an three, an four-"

They would dance 2 more songs before Eli called in interrupting and plans for the next time would have to be made.


	3. Barney Calhoun X GN Reader

Anon asked! Could you by any chance do a barney calhoun x gender neutral reader? maybe about taking care of him after a long day being a metrocop?

I really hope I did this character justice I was feeling emotional with this one.

******************************************************************

The days were longer than he could keep track of. Exhaustion didn't quite cover what he felt, it was much more deep set than that. In order to be exhausted he had to be able to rest but this ongoing relentless life made it just a regular feeling that never went away.

It was one of the days where somehow it felt worse. The wear of a particularly brutal day had his feet dragging back to his building block. A gnawing feeling of regret mixed with powerlessness filled his chest as visions of the bodies refused to clear.

You'd think after years of this he would get used to it. But always at random times a cry that twisted too painfully, or the tears of someone that reminded him of a person he could almost remember ripped into his chest reopening the hurt freshly.

Part of him wanted to end it all. But if he did that they would win. And all this work would be for nothing. He couldn't do that after everything they had done, sometimes progress felt like leaps and sometimes it was months without so much as a step. He told himself it was worth and once he finally shut the door and let his helmet drop on the floor he was reminded why he kept fighting as he did.

They stepped out to him quickly like they always did, with a look of relief that said they were happy to have him back again. Some days felt more tense than others and as plans proceeded the threat of discovery and worry that he might not come back that time grew worse.

Through his tired eyes that had growing bags he still smiled that same Barney grin that they had fallen for. How even now he managed to stay so charismatic was beyond them. Approaching him they reached for him sighing in solace their hands coming to his shoulders.

Barney despite everything he'd seen still had an undying fire that refused to go out. It not only helped him to keep going but everyone else as well. Wrapping their arms around his neck he relaxed into their touch and let his arm come around their waist.

Hugging them always made things feel better, as cheesy as it was he thought that it was like magic. Somehow with just a touch they made his tired body not ache so much. And a bit of himself came back anytime they kissed him. How he was so lucky to have them in this place was something he couldn't understand.

"You look tired."

They hummed quietly not letting go. He shut his eyes a moment letting his chin rest on the side of their head able to smell their hair. Even when dirty they had a nice scent, natural and real. They smelled alive and human.

"I feel tired babe."

He muttered which made them pull back slightly to look up at him. Smiling in gentle sympathy they reached to take his hand and lead him to bed. On nights like this he was too tired to eat, not that there was much. With their help he slowly shed the armor and gear he had not caring where it landed. The cool air of the room met his skin soothing him bit by bit as more was removed.

He had never felt happier to see such a horrible bed. Collapsing onto it he exhaled hard as his legs thanked him for finally getting off them. They joined him quickly slipping under his arm without a word. Happy for their touch he melted down comfortably, ignoring the springs and lumps. Pulling them in closer so they were nestled onto his side he looked at them not wanting to close his eyes yet. These times were so short. He didn't get much time to sleep and even less to be like this.

How was it that without words they could help him so easily? It was like just knowing that they cared about him was enough. Looking at them reminded him of everything and how important doing this work was. They listened to his heartbeat and reached up to rest their hand on his chest softly circling their finger absentmindedly. Just seeing that was enough for him to put his hand over theirs and bring it to his lips.

"I love you babe."

Even though they had barely spoken that night so much had been said in actions. Looking up to him softly they smiled happy to hear those words. They meant everything and could only shake their head as he gave them that charismatic smirk through his tiredness.

"Oh Barney..."

Leaning closer they let their face rest against his for a second happy, even in the situation.

"I love you too."

That was all he needed. Moving in they kissed each other softly holding all the tenderness and hope in the world for each other. Keeping their hand to his chest he let them feel his heart beating reminding them that so long as it did he would be with them. He would help fix this world and give them a future. One they deserved and a life together they had always wanted. With those dreams of freedom calming his worried thoughts he let himself drift off as they stayed warm at his side feeling ready to take on whatever else would come his way.


	4. Ultimatum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I got this ask!
> 
> Hello again! I thought about my request for a bit, my former idea involved Barney but I saw an anon already ask about him. Consider this concept: Set in HL1, The reader is a Black Mesa Scientist. They are good friends with Gordon, who is secretly being observed by the Gman. From his observation, Gman learns there's untold feelings between the two, and perhaps he uses this gain an advantage over Gordon? @myommarie  
> This one gets pretty sad and I really hope id the direction you were thinking of. Might redo this to be longer and more detailed but I ended up getting in my feelings on this one.

"If you hurt them-"

Gordon's low voice was interrupted by a dry laugh from the tall willowy man.

"Dr. Freeman if you were really wise you wouldn't threaten the one giving you an ultimatum."

His voice snaked around him only dragging his threat around him even more. Gordon knew he didn't have any actual control in the situation but it was so much more than just about him now. After all of this time, everything he had done this was what he was left with? Part of him wished he had never met them, not because he wanted to be without them but because they would be in a blissful world not affected by his own cruel fate. It wasn't fair. But so far everything this man had him do was far from fair.

Things had been so simple he hadn't even realized how much he appreciated it. Though he guessed that's just how things always are. He didn't remember when they had become friends it was like they had simply just rooted into his life. They didn't squabble or derail his ideas nearly as much as the others did. When they walked into the lab he perked a bit and they would immediately start talking about whatever came to mind. Work or something they watched the night before. Conversation was so easy and their presence helped keep him sane.

Friendship was something he took seriously and the way this one had started so quickly and naturally made him willing to do pretty much anything for him. The few nights out for drinks with Barney and when they helped him set up his living quarters flashed through his mind unexpectedly. How well they fit into his life was something he'd never questioned. Now suddenly this man, with his content face that layered with an air of arrogance he hated, now he had them.

Why him? Why him specifically? None of this made any sense to him. Why them? What could they possibly hold to this man's plan? 

"Dr. Freeman I don't want to be the one to have to remind you that all though my time is well- subject compared to yours- I suggest making a decision with a bit more haste. One wouldn't want to, hm, keep them waiting."

His words dripped with something Gordon didn't understand. Like he knew something he didn't which panicked him immediately thinking he had done harm or worse to them.

"They told me to tell you not to do what I ask of you. They are observant I'll give them that. To persevere for those one loves is a trait I highly respect, unfortunately as of now."

His words hit Gordon with an unexpected weight. So they knew what was happening. Or at least knew there was danger, god knew where they were but still even though it was his fault that they were in this mess, he was their only priority. The word love hung lastly as his chest clenched. He loved them, always had. And he never even realized how deep that love really was too busy selfishly taking in their presence. Had he ever considered how they felt? Of course he hadn't that's why they always called him a big dummy.

His resolve wavered knowing that he wouldn't do what they asked. He couldn't. Surely they would both die or worse otherwise and he wouldn't let them suffer because of his own mindless following of the man's orders. How he wished he wasn't lucky enough to met them. Maybe it wouldn't ache so much to step off the tram as the man watched with a look of pure satisfaction. Maybe he wouldn't of had to realize he would never get to tell them his feelings. And maybe he would have heard them said back. 

If he had the chance he would tell them how much they mattered. How sorry he was for never saying something, he would have kissed them the day he got the sudden urge to that he had ignored. He’d leave this lab and never come back. Mostly he would say how much they appreciated their love for him even if he had never reciprocated it.

But it was too late now.


	5. Isaac Kleiner X Gender Neutral Reader

The clipboard hit the floor with a clatter that made all eyes fall onto them. Alyx looked on at Kleiner excitedly but quickly stepped back as the look on his face told her that this moment wasn't to be disturbed. He stayed unmoving eyes fixed forward in pure shock unable to find any words. He didn't blink, if he did maybe they would have just been a hallucination and would go away just as they had so long ago. A short faint breath finally came out as their hands came up slightly trembling like they were just as scared as he was.

"Isaac?"

Their voice was a whisper, too scared to talk and have this be some joke or dream. Another beat passed a long tension as they both struggled to really accept that they really were seeing each other. In his own instinct, like he was reassuring himself, his hand came up pushing up his glasses to be sure it really was then. 

"Mouse?"

He uttered aloud not caring who heard. Upon hearing it their face erupted into a grin that was met by immediate tears. Not caring about the papers he dropped his hands were up reaching for their face desperate to be sure it really was them. Gasping in sharply through the sob that broke out they absolutely collapsed into his touch their hands coming up to grab his wrists. Feeling their cheek and jaw in his palms a wash of deep warm love fell over him as he felt it was the same as it always had been.

Unable to believe his eyes the few in the lab felt emotional as Kleiner actually looked ready to cry. Holding them firmly with years of pent up emotion he wanted them to feel everything he had since the day he lost them and everything else. Through a voice overrun with worry and relief like a weight had come off him he whispered,

"I thought I lost you..."

The years of pain and loss flooded their face only making them hold his wrists even tighter.

"I-I know-"

Choking out a sob finally breaking they looked down and sniffed hard.

"I'm sorry! I'm so-"

In horror Kleiner pulled their chin slightly so they would look at him his face full of alarm as he exclaimed in pure shock.

"What??? No! No no!"

Hurriedly shaking his head he pulled closer denying them immediately. His face twisted with remorse despising himself for ever making them feel this way. The weight of his actions which he was forced to ignore and try to take account for bore heavy on him. In that moment so much grief and happiness came back at once. He spoke serious refusing to let them take any blame.

"This is my fault."

Eyes getting distant he struggled as it crushed him inside. Gordon, who had never actually talked to him about Black Mesa, took a step forward uncomfortable with Kleiner taking any of his blame. But Alyx's hand came up to stop him as Kleiner shook his head.

"Maybe if I...this all..."

It was hard to see the usually lively Kleiner suddenly so sad. In all the time they knew him most of them had never even seen him cry. Except for Gordon, let alone take any blame for everything that had happened. Nobody could have guessed what weighed on the man's conscience, but it was quickly absolved as they suddenly pressed their forehead to his.

"Isaac."

They said softly silencing him quickly as he absolutely sank once they spoke taking pure joy in hearing their voice.

"It doesn't matter. I found you."

Alyx couldn't help but wipe at her eye a bit getting emotional as Kleiner let out a happy short laugh overcome with emotion. Finding them was not easy and pure coincidence. Kleiner had never given up hope but there was no trace of them. His search for them was a secret he didn't want others to burden with but once Alyx found out she made it her mission. The find was an accident. 

Happy accidents didn't happen in this world anymore. A reunion so much later after everything was too good to be true. Everyone happily smiled, even Gordan, as Kleiner placed a kiss to their forehead before pulling them into his arms tightly. Safe and close in his embrace they cried softly as he held their head into his shoulder.

"I almost gave up-"

They whispered in a small terrified voice. Isaac sighed shakily and rocked them gently knowing they had every right to have thought that way. In a reassuring voice filled with love he replied back,

"I never did. Not once."


	6. Gordon Freeman X Meg *self insert*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some self indulgent fluff and I sang Ed Sheeran cuz why not

Had he heard that laugh before? It was a question that even caught himself off guard. Something about the sudden tinkling laugh was such a specific sound it felt like was somehow sitting far back his memory. Kleiner noticed the pause in Gordon's expression as he thought. Smiling to himself lightly the face reminded him of when he would make it in his class so so many years ago. It was hard to believe those time had happened and he treasured them more than Gordon really knew. Those times crept back to him slowly distant ringing as bikes passed by the campus of MIT and students busily rushed by.

He was in his 3rd year at the time and arguing heartily with a fellow classmate who's name now slipped his mind but his thick eyebrows were something that always stuck out to him. It was a nice day and warm with a busy campus lot as students prepared for some kind of arts festival. Probably for clubs Gordon noted as he never really paid much attention to it.

"I'm just saying that thesis sucks."

"Thanks. Really glad I shared that with you."

He earned a slap on the back as they laughed it off not actually bitter about it and wondered what was for lunch. A small stage was set up which was where he finally heard it from. A light happy laugh rang above as if somebody had unexpectedly seen something incredibly funny. Glancing away from his mate he looked over wondering what was going on and caught sight of a few students prepping instruments while one girl held a guitar case and was laughing so hard her hand was over her face.

He didn't pay it much mind looking away but when everyone else in the group laughed as well he glanced back, his eyes fell onto her as her hand came down. A lovely young woman clearly very young probably maybe 20 handed someone else the guitar case. What caught his attention was how bright she was. She seemed to radiate a positive energy and was very much enjoying herself. He grinned a bit and looked away as his mate pulled him along to go eat. Lazily he wondered if she played guitar but didn't think on it again.

In the lab Kleiner cleared his throat getting Gordon's mind off the memory. Looking down a bit embarrassed to be so distracted Kleiner only grinned to himself happy to see him relaxed for once and got back to work. He didn't think back on it again until finally exiting the lab. As he did he heard that laugh again. It drifted from down the hall towards a group of rebels. The second he saw her immediately the memories came back and he suddenly remembered standing again on campus watching the pretty young woman doing soundcheck.

He didn't recognize her beyond earlier that day across the quad. One of the clubs had music performances and she was helping to set up the mic and laughing at the sound guy who kept making big motions trying to be funny. Gordon had a vanilla latte as he always did and watched enjoying time out of yet another lecture. He heard her voice through the mic finally after a screech,

"Woah- mic check mic check? Whoop whoop yay!"

She gave a thumbs up as instruments were brought up behind her.

"What else do we do for testing?"

She asked as speakers were set down and around another person busily ran past with a still drying banner that was being done too late. She nodded and sighed at whatever the sound guy said clearly a bit shy and on the spot.

"You sure?"

More swooping motions and she laughed before trying to compose herself.

"Okay. Sorry if it's bad. I get nervous."

More swooping had her look away trying to compose herself before steadying.

"Just anything? Okay. Let me know."

Taking a breath she tried to ignore the eyes on her which made Gordon wonder if she was new to this realizing she was going to sing. Exhaling she started to sing immediately getting the attention of others. Trying to not get embarrassed she pushed on clearly enjoying the song.

Her genuine voice had him pleasantly surprised. She looked comfortable and happy singing like she really had something to say to her words. The way she smiled back to her friends only made her almost glow getting further into the song. 

(Photograph by Ed Sheeran sang by Me: https://voca.ro/eXKakxeytrW )

Her soft voice would stick with him but he wouldn't get a chance to see the real performance. What really stayed in his memory was the shy laugh she gave off into the mic once she finished and her friends whooped very loudly.

"Was that a good check?"

A few others clapped which made her wave and bow a bit awkwardly clearly not expecting it. He joined in though he was probably too far away to be heard. She seemed to have noticed anyways and glanced over. Her eyes set on him curiously and rested for a moment taking him in. He slowed clapping and nodded to her politely to which she flashed a bright smile of thanks. It was a lovely smile that made him have to look away.

He would see her around the campus a very few times. It turned out she wasn't a student but he never had reason to actually speak to her aside from when he commented about her singing to her at a club sign up table. She was smaller than him but seemed unbothered and happy to see him. Thanking him she asked for his name and he regretfully forgot hers. 

He would remember her face and that kind laugh but over the years it would eventually fade into college memories. A cute college crush and nothing more. He didn't know that she asked about him after seeing him around and would even attempt a read at his work. But scientists were considered out of their league by many.

She stopped by the science department to give lunch to a friend and got excited when she saw him. They almost never spoke but he could always hear her laugh and say hello excitedly to anyone. Sometimes she would wave to him with a bright, "Hi Gordon!" How bad it felt now to have forgotten her name and to have never been brave enough to do more than smile back and awkwardly talk about science. But she would come to memory anytime school life was brought up over the years fondly.

Now suddenly she was there and looking up at him with a very different look. His stomach dropped as he recognized her face. She was beautiful. And a bit older just as he was. Still younger than him though she looked tired and worn just as everyone else did. To his regret she stared at him just like everyone else did. With a look that labeled him as THE Gordon Freeman. It was a look he fully well knew he deserved but made him feel achingly lonely and tired.

But seeing a familiar face made him glad, he had never seen her around and wondered if she was new to the rebels. He wondered if she actually recognized him unaware of Kleiner looking at him with an expression of fond reminiscence. In her eyes a thousand thoughts were there and he wondered how many of them blamed him for undoubtedly ruining hers and everyone else’s lives.

But the shocked cloudiness in her gaze faltered like she was finally really seeing him and to his shock he got a look he had not seen in a very long time. She smiled at him in that same kind way from so many years ago like she was happy to see him.

"Hi Gordon."


	7. Barney Calhoun Sex Headcanons

As requested by @svetathevulpixaaaa  
“Hello! Sorry if i bother you... But can you do some Barney NSFW headcanons with a Female Reader please?”

Of course!! 

-It's always incredibly easy to tell when Barney is horny because he gets tense and shifty, won't stop glancing at you. But that's only in situations when he can't touch you most of the time he'll grab you into his arms and flat tel you what he wants, "baby you got me going right now." then will proceed to ravage you

-When he wants to get into the mood he'll take a shower if he can and will size himself up in the mirror imagining what he'll do to you. But Barney is a very virile bastard and will honestly be ready just at the sight of you

-He's fairly dominant and enjoys being called baby and MAYBE daddy if you say it right. But he'll be very embarrassed afterwards

-He's a big fan of doggy because he can be all the way inside of you easily and knows you enjoy that the most. He loves doing everything he can to make you as pleasured as possible and loves that his cock can do so much for you seeing you on him drives him insane and he'll lean back a lot just to watch him entering you again and again and your expression.

-Talks a lot during sex to the point where you try to shut him up sometimes. "Baby yeah baby come on." "You want it? Tell me please baby."

-Big on morning sex and will make up every morning cuddling you and quickly get turned on. Heavy slower sex that's always a bit more passionate in its own way

-Very needy. If he's in the mood too often he'll try not to bother you especially if you're not in the mood or going through something. Will get fidgety and touch starved.

-Buys your birth control. "You go through the rest figure this is just fair."

-Will buy you tampons and after an embarrassing first mistake will gladly buy them for you after.

-Loves tickling and playing with you just to see you squeal

-"You're my girl y’know that?"

-Great at after care and will spoon and kiss you until you're lulled to sleep

-Worries a lot about your vaginal health after trying his best to research it. It's hilarious at times but he tries really hard to understand and is worried he'll hurt you in anyway. 

"This article says your vaginal pH level might be incompatible to some semen. Have I ever left you feeling tight or itchy afterwards?"

"BARNEY."

"THIS IS SERIOUS BABE."

-Doesn't watch porn because he laughs too much at the weird ass plots-An ass man more than tits but he will jiggle them around and say "like pudding" just to annoy you

-Sloppy and everywhere when he eats you out. Very good at tongue fucking and loves licking your clit and feeling you tangle around his head. He will always make a comment after about what a great meal it is that makes you hide your face and he’ll laugh at you.

-Likes lingerie but never says because he doesn't want to push you or anything

-Gets into ass grabbing/smacking and slight biting and hickeys when really really going at it during sex especially after a stressful day


End file.
